Daily Practice.

When it is hardest to give myself to practice, it is the most important to do so.

Big changes are afoot in my life, and I - knocked off center - come back to the zafu, sit in front of my quiet altar, draw a card for contemplation from my goddess deck, and receive Kuan Yin. Goddess of Compassion. She will lead my practice today.

I draw at random from my stack of meditation books. It’s Jon Kabbat-Zinn’s Wherever You Go, There You Are. I open to a page at random, and it’s an essay called “The My-Way Meditation.”

I find my way in the few minutes of quiet. The way of surrender. The power of prayer enfolds me, and I surrender to being held by something larger.

I feel my heart constrict, a baby in the birth canal, I am being pushed through this moment, into a larger awareness of self, of potential.

Death and birth are solitary walks. Every moment of it, truly alone…yet not alone. In facing my absolute sense of self, I break nearly into a knowing of the larger truth – that there is no alone.

Compassion sits just outside my reach, because I have placed it there. Presence is, or is not. Presence is releasing expectation, releasing attachment, releasing time.

There is no time in the eternal now, the forever unfolding is-ness of the moment.

I am present, in practice. I am breathing compassion, in practice.

So I come back to the meditation altar, back to the pillow, and sit.